Monday, December 21, 2009

Resolutions, Part 2

In my aptly named post, Resolutions, Part 1, I promised there would be a second part—that’s the main reason for putting a “1” after the word “Part.” I heard all the groans, and don’t think that I didn’t; I have excellent cyber hearing. At least I’m being kind by sneaking in Part 2 while you’re all busy with Christmas preparations.

Lettuce review Part 1 then, where I stated my major resolution:

1. I will reduce stress.

Okay, that’s enough review, so here are the rest of my New Year’s resolutions for 2010:

2. I will reduce stress. On the surface, this appears to be somewhat similar to number 1. The difference is I resolve to not listen, read, or watch ANYTHING that has to do with politicians.

3. I will reduce stress. Another similarity, except that I resolve to cease my attempt to reconcile the Nobel Prize for Peace and the “surge.” Sending 35,000 men and women to search thousands of caves and patrol the sand dunes is like sending 10 guys to fight a Santa Ana-caused wildfire in Southern California.

4. I will reduce stress. Are you starting to notice a pattern here? I resolve to ignore the plight of the poor banks, the poor health insurance companies, and any large corporation that has out-sourced its operations to China at the cost of American jobs.

If it sounds like I’m sticking my head in the sand for the coming year, I suppose I am. All of the things I’ve mentioned make my blood boileth over, which is not conducive to my longevity. Lung disease has me on the ropes as it is, and getting all upset over people and situations I can do nothing about is counter-productive. With that in mind,

5. I will continue to blog.

6. I will be here next year to resolute for 2011.

7. I will religiously change my socks once a week, whether or not they need changing. When I say “religiously,” I don’t mean with incense and holy water and a pulpit . . .


Stinkypaw said...

As far as I'm concerned, your 6th resolution is the best. Looking forward to hold you to that one! Take care and enjoy your stress reduce life, I know I will! ;-)

Fay's Too said...

Please reconsider the incense.
PS, denial is more than just a river in Egypt, it has it's place in keeping us sane and alive. Choose your battles, boy! Good on ya.

Stella said...

Sounds good to me Charlie. Although I had resolved not to have any resolutions, I think I'll go along with 1, 2, 3 and 4 and I look forward to enjoying no. 5, agreed no. 6 and as for no. 7 - are you of the "if they stick to the wall they need changing" school of thought? : )

savannah said...

i resolve in 2010 to once again, not make any new years resolutions i can't keep! xoxoxoxox ;~D

Tiffin said...

Hooray, I'm with you! It's enough stress getting the shortbread for my father-in-law baked. I am going to adopt your resolutions wholeheartedly, Sir Charles - er, except for the socks (I have a lower tolerance level to crustiness than you do).

mapstew said...

It's time for a fun year I think!


Charlie said...

STINKY: That's the one I'm definitely going to try to keep! I'm fighting this disease the best I can, and you've been one of the helpers.

FAY: Incense is fine, but I was referring to the church kind—the stuff that chokes you half to death.

And my battle is chosen.

STELLA: You sure are agreeable! Regarding #7, I am of the school of "if they can stand in the corner by themselves." Your school is icky—it must be the theory at Trinity College.

SAVANNAH: Words of wisdom from the lady in Georgia. Yeah, I'll probably break one or two, especially #7, but I'll try my best.

TUI: We ALL need a break from the bullshit, be it American or Canadian.

I'm surprised that you don't know by now that "male" and "crusty" are synonyms.

MAP: I hope so too, my friend.

Robert the Skeptic said...

After several failed attempts at making (and keeping) New Year's resolutions I finally resolved not to ever make any more New Year's resolutions.

It was the only resolution I made that ever stuck. I highly recommend it.

Pat said...

No groans from me ducks! I just enjoy reading you.
'If it sounds like I’m sticking my head in the sand for the coming year, I suppose I am.'
This I heartily endorse; my mantra - if you can't do anything about it stop fretting.
And #5 is one I am totally in favour of.

Charlie said...

ROBERT: You are the wisest of them all, O Wise One, but I'll try my best.

How did you do during Lent when you were a kid?

PAT: England is suffering through the same crap we are, and I know you all feel as helpless as we do.

And thank you for #5.

Kim Ayres said...

5 & 6 are the really important ones. The rest are too, if they help you achieve 5 & 6. Let's face it, does making your blood boil actually change any of the events that have you simmering?

Stella said...

Ah I'm a very agreeable person Charlie : )

Wandering Coyote said...

I double dog dare you to keep to #7!!!

Hey, I have snagged Early Reader books from LT two months in a row now - does that often happen, do you know?

Charlie said...

KIM: To answer your question, no. But (there's always a "but"), I can't read about liars, cheats, thieves, liars, villains, polluters, warmongers, controllers, and people with their hands in my wallet without getting angry.

STELLA: Not that I doubt you, but (there's another "but") will your husband confirm it?

WC: A double dog dare! Oh boy, we're gonna have a sock contest!

I haven't heard of two in row on LT--they must like you because you don't make snide remarks like I do. Are either of them any good?

Wandering Coyote said...

One I just got the other day - the new Tracy Chevalier novel, and one I will be receiving in the new year. Don't worry - there will be reviews!

koonsmother said...

#5 FTW

I've had two ER books in a row from LT more than once. Nyah, nyah, nyah. *reminds self to finish the damned John Irving review already.*