Monday, July 04, 2011

10 Things I Hate in My Mouth

1. Brussels sprouts.

2. Dental equipment.

3. The ham-sized fist attached to the dental equipment.

4. Hair in my food (makes me want to puke).

5. Puke.

6. Dirt (as in "a mouthful of", most often from taking a header in the. . . dirt).

7. Soap, for washing it out.

8. The dog's tongue.

9. Someone else's filthy key ring to suck on.

10. Reader's choice. Tell us the number 1 thing you hate in your mouth.

34 comments:

Kim Ayres said...

Angry words, and any reason they might have been put there

Kid-at-heart said...

Boy, you're taking an awful chance with this one.   But I'll be nice.  It's that nasty little cracking sensation that means there was a teensy fragment of shell in that egg salad sandwich I just ate.

Eryl Shields said...

Flies, especially if they're still alive.

Pat said...

Fenning's Fever Cure and bile.

savannah said...

slimy okra. just the thought makes me ill. right now. *shiver*

xoxoxoxox even though i'm going to be silently retching all day!

Charlie Callahan said...

I knew this was a lame post, but your answer is wonderful. I don't care what anybody says, you're a good man, Kim Ayres.

Charlie Callahan said...

Never heard of the stuff, Pat, but I'll stay away from it anyway.

Charlie Callahan said...

I'm sorry to make you retch, Sav. I seem to have that affect on a lot of people.

Cathy said...

Mushrooms.  Yech!!!

Charlie Callahan said...

I don't like the poisonous kind—I carry this poster in my wallet just to make sure (Click on image to see it full-size).

Charlie Callahan said...

Do your flies buzz with a Scottish accent? (Stupid question, isn't it.)

Uh, how do you get dead flies in your mouth? (Not so stupid a question.)

Alice said...

Earwax.  (As in...after you itch the inside of your ear and then mistakenly put your finger in your mouth.)

Sydlaughs said...

A cockroach--I once saw one hanging around the corner of a fellows mouth.  It was an awful image.

Ponita said...

I have to agree with your #1, Charlie... I hate brussel sprouts! Kim has the best answer, though. And I've had flies (live ones) in my mouth... inhaled during horseback riding lessons! A whole lotta coughing happened after that... and spitting.

TechnoBabe . said...

Probably pain. 

Cathy said...

Does the poster in your wallet make your butt look fat?  
.

Charlie Callahan said...

I like to think it looks buff, but fat is the reality. Plus. I limp a little on that side. Chalk it up to old fartdom—we can get away with looking weird.

Charlie Callahan said...

Oh YUCK, Alice! Do you know what that stuff is made of? No, I don't either. I suppose if I ask you what it tastes like, you'll say chicken.

Charlie Callahan said...

I'm with you on that, Babe.

Charlie Callahan said...

You mean there are flies around horses?? You should have designed a mouth protector: a piece cut out of your screen door, some string to tie it around your head, and voila!

Charlie Callahan said...

My mom almost ate an earwig once on a piece of cake; that is, the earwig was on the cake, not mom.

I bet there are a lot of bug-eating horror stories out there.

Charlie Callahan said...

"Boy, you're taking an awful chance with this one."

You know I like living on the edge: I dare any female to say it.

And FYI, I don't like egg salad sandwiches, with or without the shell on.

Mapstew said...

As a man who was schooled by The Christian Brothers in Ireland I have so many answers to that question! But seriously, the thing I really don't like in my mouth is a piece of one of my teeth!  :¬)

Charlie Callahan said...

I totally agree, Map. When I suddenly bite down on something hard I never know whether it's Martha's mashed potatoes or a piece of tooth. If it's a piece of tooth, I know the pain is about to begin.

I commiserate with you, us two old toothless bastards.

Mapstew said...

I still have a couple of good ones Charles, I use 'em for softening thr leather to make shoes!  :¬)

Kim Ayres said...

By yawning, or by not being aware they have got themselves stuck in your food or cup of tea. Or in one memorable case from childhood, when I was out cycling and munching on bubble gum - I blew a large bubble and as I rode through a cloud of flies and before I realised what I 'd done, I'd popper the bubble and started chewing the gum again...

Charlie Callahan said...

I picture you as a child with short hair and a beard, cycling along pondering the validity of Anselm's Ontological Argument, when fate sent you through a cloud of insects. Taking the gum out of your mouth, you decide that Anselm was full of shit, the gum looks like it's covered with poppy seeds, and you resume chewing to blow poppy seed-covered bubbles.

Or something like that.

Charlie Callahan said...

You poor man. Chewing leather all these years so your girls could have shoes for school. As the girls begin to leave the nest to fly on their own, will you finally get you first pair?

FAY said...

I've been thinking on this one.  I've come to the conclusion that it's a tie.  Liver and onions and a guy I dated rather briefly a long time ago.  A lot of similarities now that I think of it.

Charlie Callahan said...

I agree with both of your choices, Fay: I hate liver and onions and a guy you dated rather briefly a long time ago.

Tiffin said...

1.  Grit in asparagus
2.  anything metal (dental tools, foil wrappers on things)...just sends a shiver right through me

I like Kim's answer a lot. Same category as lies.  I love brussels sprouts (most people overcook them) but liver won't pass these lips.

Entre Nous said...

The sour taste of bitterness,,,, as in,,,, the insurance company raised my rates because the old lady hit my car and forced me to file a claim.....   ugh.

Charlie Callahan said...

We agree on a lot of things, Tui, but I don't like having asparagus in my grit.

Charlie Callahan said...

So much for no-fault insurance.

"The sour taste of bitterness" is another good answer, like Kim's way up on top. It isn't necessarily objects that we don't want in our mouths.